NYSE Plummets as Sky is Falling Rumors Abound

stocks drop post-election
stocks drop post-election

Stocks took a lemming-like dive off the cliff after election results catch pundits off balance. Ignore the rumors.

Earlier this morning, Mizz Snarkity Snark saw a post on The Book of Faces that said, to wit:

HEADS UP PEOPLE STOCK MARKETS GOTTA MAJOR SELL OUT AND IS DOWN OVER 13,000 poInts

Considering that the warriors of Wall Street are temporarily disarmed by the news that Romney will not be buying the New York Stock Exchange as had been so eagerly anticipated, a bit of exaggeration is understandable.

Rumor Plus Gossip Does Not Equal Gospel

But, please. MSS hastens to remind would-be rumormongers that there are persons out there so completely wrapped up in believing anything they see on the Book of Faces and the Interwebs that they will see that “NYSE Down 13000 points” and be entirely convinced that it is true, without having the mental agility to Check The Facts.

Quick Lesson in Truth in Headlines vs Rumor

Here’s a handy guide to help decipher the outrageous news from the factual:

TRUTH -> USGS Reports 7.4 Quake in Guatemala

RUMOR -> Stock Exchange Drops 13000 Points

TRUTH -> Obama Wins Second Term

RUMOR -> Republicans Storm White House, Set Oval Office on Fire

TRUTH -> Colorado Legalizes Marijuana

RUMOR -> Colorado Donates 54 Tons of Marijuana to Georgetown University for Disaster Relief

Got it? Good show. Thanks for helping. This is the sort of out-of-control newsing that gives media a bad name and causes random runs on toilet paper at the local grocery.

Much love to each of you. Please keep the little ones away from headline news sources for the next day or so.

 

Vote Like You Mean It

Get the vote out, wear the sticker, offer a ride
Get the vote out, wear the sticker, offer a ride

I voted. Did you? Did you offer someone a ride to the polls? Good!

Those who read Mizz Snarkity Snark know perfectly well that she is an apolitical creature far more prone to expensive mornings at the hair salon getting her porcelain nails done and her hair permed than lurking around campaign headquarters looking for opportunities to staple reports and get coffee.

In fact, MSS is pretty dang disgusted with almost every presidency since Give ‘Em Hell Harry the Haberdasher Truman. Including the upcoming one, no matter who he is.

Harry won by being unpopular and determined to tell the American populace the truth, no matter how ouchy and uncomfortable and not-very-satiny things got.

Incarnations of Harry Truman, take note. The task of being elected is vastly more difficult with these pesky Interwebs spreading news faster than the speed of a bad case of diarrhea at a rubber chicken banquet. So a few rules apply:

  • Tell the truth. All of it. No matter how bad the taste.
  • Don’t pretend to know what you don’t.
  • Own and wear a good hat.
  • If there’s a war, be sorry we have to be there, not thrilled to deploy the War Machine.
  • Pray over every coffin of every man and every woman who can’t come back alive.
  • Don’t make promises you can’t keep.
  • Don’t make promises your successor can’t keep.
  • Visit people for coffee, and listen to them for longer than you talk to them.
  • Don’t blame the previous administration.
  • Make sure Congress knows they’re not being ignored.
  • Make sure Congress knows they need to work across the aisle no matter what.
  • Follow through.
  • Above all, be home for dinner every night and give thanks.

Small rules, but nobody every got in trouble for following them.

Much love to each of you. Vote like you mean it.